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Writer's pictureTrisha Bhattacharya

IWD' 22: THOUGHTS WE HAD...

It all spirals back to having our own freedom and choice, if I feel comfortable doing something, doesn’t mean that I will shame the ones who don’t do it my way. I read it in an interview excerpt where one goes on to say ”Just because I want to look bare-faced and accentuate my flaws, it doesn't mean that I shame a woman who is okay with getting Botox, wearing make up to shoot or insists on hair and make up to be the first thing when she wakes up in the morning’. This message is a strong one that says yes to choices of different women. But I want to make sure that the women who are doing Botox or having hair removals are doing it because they don't like a curved wrinkly part on their face or patches of hair on parts of their bodies, they are doing it based on their likings and not because they consider it beautiful to be accepted in the society, basically just under the pretense of “My body, my choice”. It is important to know and be aware of that. Yes, as humans it is in our nature to want acceptance and to fit in and I don't know if we can argue on that particular desire but it is on us that we don’t dilute our individuality in the stream of diverse collectivity. Now ask, what is beautiful and what is ugly? The definitions are different for all and they keep changing. That way nothing is every really beautiful or ugly, they are just a matter of perception at a certain time. We also say how it is important to show off their natural raw self and that we want more rawness on screen without hiding imperfections. We are fighting for representation of true selves. But also support a woman doing Botox, who is not keeping it real and raw. Why are we doing it then? And what is our stance? Are we not saying that raw and real is the need and the best way to represent diversity? You see, now we are in a loop, in moments of such confusion, we are only left with the choices we create for ourselves based on who we feel we are. We can’t and shouldn’t influence people if the influence will have them doubt their choices. Influence! Sure do that, till the time it helps people understand and see what’s fundamentally and mentally best for them.

In response to the above thought I proposed, here are some add-ons to it from few friends:


"It’s very well put out. Because yes there is a dilemma where we want people to do what they want and according to their wishes but how much of that want is actually internalized misogyny.

Why do we want to be “perfect”? And who decided what perfect is?"


"Absolutely....it boils down to "My body My choice".

From starting to things such as body hair and makeup...it can be lifted up to greater things such as having sex or having a baby.

Until and unless a woman is not pressurized or forced to do either of these...and it is her decision taken in full sobriety....no other person can judge her and take her down."


"Its "my body my choice" only if the choice is actually a choice.

I will always be against all that surgery shiz.

Always. But I wont shame anyone YET I would know that it harms what women fight for by suiting into the sexualized notions. Body neutrality is conflicted here or beauty for the matter.

And while feeling insecure, I might as well feel grateful to have those who remind me WHO I AM and I think that's beautiful We cant change what people want. People will be toxic intentionally and unintentionally. You have to make yourself happy at the end of the day.

DEVELOPING A MECHANISM OF SELF EMPOWERMENT IS VERY CRUCIAL HERE.

But once you have recognized that you are a good person with beautiful intentions. that's all you need. When you help someone in need, that feels precious. All the insecurities of subtle skin folds wipe out and I think that's beautiful. The feeling after a street dog accepts your biscuit and wags its tail, Who is going to care if you are a triangle or oval or an hourglass or a pencil?

LOOK AT SATYAJIT RAY'S WOMEN. Look at Jane Austen's women maybe. A heroine comes in with her thoughts and philosophies and that's freaking hot and beautiful."


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